Dealing with Loss - Part 1

Day 0 - Denial

I slammed my fist on the table crying:
"No this can't be. How could this happen."
Cimp sat next to me hugging me in his strong manly arms.
"Don't you worry beardling we can get through this together."
"But how can I live without her?"
I asked him knowing he is the only one who can understand my pain even though many have suffered it before me. The feeling of emptiness I feel inside me after she is gone.
"It cannot be, she can't be gone, I don't believe it really had to be done....

As you may see grief overtook my life at this stage and it was up to me to deal with it there was no other choice. Even with Cimp standing by my side and me knowing the truth I could not acknowledge it in any way, shape or form. The abyss inside me was growing at this stage and the only way I could deal with it was to grieve...

I was laying on the table crying, not being able to comprehend the truth that was right before my eyes.
*Sob sob...*
Cimp came and sat next to me once again:
"Beardling I know it hurts I want you to know that I'm here with you."
I couldn't stop crying but through my sobs I replied:
"Thank you for being here for me...."
I continued to lie on the table trying to understand how the world would be like from now on. I knew I had to get it together eventually but for now I just cried. I couldn't stop even if I wanted.

As you can guess It was a harsh day for me the first of many. I had to learn how to live with myself like this. My worst fears came to life. I had to shave....

Something about me 3

So 2nd day in a row I don't know what to write so here comes some unimportant peice of non-content.

First thing to mention is that I have a little brother who is 7 years younger than me. He is a gamer as am I and he is a really obnoxious kid but I still like him. Well he is my brother after all.

My favorite games that I play are RPGs but I tend to not finish them because of the grind needed to progress. For example the Dragon Age series I played all 3 but finished none fo them all bore me. I tend to have a nostalgic boner every time I get to talk about Gothic I and II those game shaped my youth and I love them till death. I dont really like playing with a controller only thing I play with a controller is Dark Souls and whenever I go to some of my friends places because they dont play PC games too much. Currently I am playing Skyforge and I find it really fun for some reason.

And that's something more about me and my gaming side.

Something about me 2

Ok guys so I'm back at this because I have absolutely no idea what to write about :(

So here goes nothing. As many of you might know I will be moving in a couple of weeks to Czech Republic for my uiversity. I have a Fianceé and her name is Michaela. She likes art loves reading, writes short stories (mainly with erotic plots), paints and takes photos.

I really like slovak cuisine as well as chinese and italian. And I also absolutely love sushi.

I love reading books mainly fantasy and horror. I have read the Lord of the Rings series, a lot of books by Stephen King and half of the Witcher s
eries of books because it's suprisingly hard to get a hold of those.

The photo bellow is of me and my fianceé now. It's few years old but still one of my favorites. :)

And that's all for this part of this. Love ya and thank you for all the support.

Metal Gear What?

As many of you have probably known already Cimp's brother has been visitin us and as many of you have probably noticed a small game called Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain just came out and the two brothers wanted to play through it together on stream. So the two of these things came together and here I made my mistake of the week by saying:
"I've never actually played the MGS games."
A loud:
"What?" Sounded in unison.
"Are you serious?" Cimp asked.
"Yeah I've never really inclined torwards the MGS series."
"Well you're in for a ride."

After what seemed like hours of exposition and story explanations we finally got to Ground Zeroes and I still didn't understand anything.
"Ok guys stop it. I really don't get the plot just from your talking. I'll just watch the walkthroughs whenever I feel like it. Peace." I said as I was leaving the room more confused than enlightened.
"Japanese developers gosh." I said to myself as the guys discussed the upcoming "Bro" Stream in the living room.

P.S.: Thanks for all your support guys :) Love ya :*
P.P.S.: If you have anything you would like to say you can write it in the comments :)

You Will Be Missed

"My little girl. Why did she have to go." Cimp was crying and I was hugging him tightly.
"Shush beardling you know she had to go." I told him with a soothing voice.
"But why does her bording school have to be so far away. My little darling she grew so fast. It seems like yesterday when she was only a child living here with us."
"Uhm.... You know it actually was yesterday."
"Yes but it seems so distant now. I miss her so much." He continued on crying for what seemed like forever until he finally calmed down a bit.
"Do you feel better now beardling? Don't worry she won't be away forever. She will come back every now and then." I smiled at Cimp with the hope that he would feel better. He didn't. He underwent another mental breakdown as desribed above.

Some time later.
"Are you hungry beardling? Can I get anything for you?"
"No leave me alone." Cimp told me while sobbing into a pillow.
I sat next to him and told him:
"Beardling you can't spend the rest of your life crying into the pillow because you miss her. You have a stream to take care of. The guys are counting on you. I am counting on you."
"You're right I need to get my shit back together." Cimp told while he was sitting up.
"Let's get something to eat and get ready for the stream."
"That's the Cimp I know. Now come on."
He smiled at me.
"Thank you for being here for me."
"I'll always be here for you."

P.S.: Thank you for all of the support guys :)
P.P.S.: Because Yondaime wrote me a long personal message the story has now changed that he is Cimps daughter. Don't question it. I most definetely won't. :D